Wednesday, April 26, 2006

Beauty Is in the Eye of the Be-Blogger

If Steve Martin remade The Jerk (and somewhere in Hollywood someone just ooohhed over that idea, and Adam Sandler's agent is getting a call), instead of running through town excited that the new phone books were in town, he'd instead go, "People's most beautiful people issue hit the newstands!"

This year, the the AP's story about the colossal event is headlined "Angelina Jolie Tops Most Beautiful List," which finally also explains why Brad and Jen had to break up--you can't have a couple with two bottoms. The story also refers to Jolie as "pillow-lipped," but I don't know about you, none of my pillows contain collagen.

All that aside, we also learn that this year we have 100 most beautiful people, not the usual 50. Which either means that we are living in an age of previously unprecedented pulchritude or the ad sales team at People had one great week and they had to fill the pages with something (to distract us from our country wanting to nuke another country so we can show them how bad it would be for them to have nukes).

The AP story also says: "All 26 spokesmodels of the NBC game show Deal or No Deal were also chosen." It's unclear if they are beautiful people 51-77, say, or if they must share one position in the 100 person ranking, sort of an alphabet of gorgeosity. If that's the case, you sort of have to feel for the people who are the equivalent of Scrabble tiles J, Q, X and Z. Sure they can pretend that makes them exotic, but it really means they'll just get fingered a lot and never be used properly.


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