Monday, October 25, 2004

Kerry's Socktober Surprise

This just in--at his appearances in swing states today, John Kerry was clearly sporting a sock that had a small yet telegenically-oozing blood stain.

Told that the words "courageous" and "hero" had been most often used to describe his recent run of campaigning, Kerry responded, "I'm proud of that. It's better than (being called) a bum or an idiot."

"And I don't mean that last part as a slur against my opponent," he added, limping off the stage to a standing ovation.

Immediate polling put him ahead by 10 points in the former swing state of New Hampshire. The Kerry campaign is also picking up steam in southern states as voters claimed they just had a feeling "he wasn't one of them darn Yankees."

From the Bush camp, Karen Hughes fired back, "C'mon, does the country really want to elect a man who will wear white tube socks with his three-piece suits?" Dick Cheney curtly replied, "Talk about terror."

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