$400 Million Doesn't Go As Far As It Used To

Since my tax money is helping to bailout Citibank, that damn well better mean there's a luxe box waiting for me here. I want Mr. Met to provide back rubs, David Wright to bring me hotdogs, and Johan Santana serving me beer.

UPDATE: And just in case you think I'm being mean to the Mets, it's just that I wanted to give them jobs I thought they could do. Finishing in at least the wild card position seems beyond them, after all.