Wednesday, January 17, 2007

Which Came First, the Chicken Hawk or the Egg?

Appearing on PBS's NewsHour last night, our commander in chief had the following exchange with host Jim Lehrer:

MR. LEHRER: Is there a little bit of a broken egg problem here, Mr. President, that there is instability and there is violence in Iraq - sectarian violence, Iraqis killing other Iraqis, and now the United States helped create the broken egg and now says, okay, Iraqis, it's your problem. You put the egg back together, and if you don't do it quickly and you don't do it well, then we'll get the hell out.

PRESIDENT BUSH: Yeah, you know, that's an interesting question. I don't quite view it as the broken egg; I view it as the cracked egg --

MR. LEHRER: Cracked egg?

PRESIDENT BUSH: -- that - where we still have a chance to move beyond the broken egg.

We know he's never been in a theater of war, but hasn't he ever been in a kitchen? Or a supermarket? Do you check the eggs at the store, find one with a crack and think, "I'm going to buy me this one and take it home and nurse it back to full eggness?" Sure, Bush hasn't met a metahpor he couldn't mangle, but the problem here is that his inability to use figurative language properly is evidence of his inabiltiy to think properly. For in the interview he also claims that to "withdraw out of Baghdad and hope for the best...would...expedite failure."

If you ask me, if you're going to fail--and it seems like we're already past that point in Iraq, since we invaded in the first place--it might be best to get it over with quickly. But Bush prefers the long, drawn out failure, say one that goes till January 2009 and some other poor fool has to take over the problem. In the meantime we know who is cracked, and who has egg on his face.

2 Comments:

Anonymous Mike said...

George, you cynic. Everyone knows if ya pray hard enough to sweet Lord Jeebus, a cracked egg will return to its state of perfection.

11:59 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Speaking of American interventions:
There's a saying in Haiti: "Once a chicken lays an egg, you cannot put it back."
When Aristide returned from exile in the US, he claimed "The egg is back! The egg is back!" A popular image in political graffiti showed a hand up a chicken's ass with the phrase "YES! You CAN put the egg back in the chicken!"
Eight months later, they learned they were wrong. Aristide was out again.
Must have been a long eight months for the chicken...

1:33 PM  

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