Be Ready to Give Him a Big Hug If He Gets an Owie

So when Chicago Cubs GM Jim Hendry signed Alfonso Soriano to a 50-year, $9 trillion contract the other day, MLB.com reported that he said:

Those of us who know him and have watched him play, he's got a great body and takes tremendous care of himself. Look at how our game has changed. There are a lot of guys 40 years old who are still playing. He's lean -- he's like a greyhound. He's some kind of athlete. That's a very young body for his age. Who knows if he'll be as productive at 38 as he is at 31?

Here's hoping Hendry knows baseball better than greyhounds--we have a stack of veterinarian bill receipts we can wave under his nose to show him how "healthy" greyhounds can be.